But you got to have friends
When hard things happen in life. When you realize it takes counseling to unpack the hurt. When little things trigger the pain of the past it is hard to know how to move forward in a good way. As I have traveled through life I am becoming more aware of the baggage I have accumulated on this road. My shoulders can become weighed down, and my mind can get gloomy, but then I remember some of the best people who have come into my life along the way.
“Encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.”
I think of my first friend Christy. As I remember her little freckles sprinkled like cinnamon and sugar across her dimpled cheeks I smile. She was always trying to get me to be a better reader as we played school in her basement.
I picture the little group of fifth-grade girls marching around the baseball diamond during recess screaming at the top of our lungs and laughing until we couldn’t breathe.
I think of the boy in my seventh-grade music class that told me I was brave when I apologized to the whole seventh grade for being a bully. He was the only one to speak to me the day after the assembly where I shared my soul. His name was Erik, he was one of the first heroes in my life.
I love how I met Jenny at a high school speech competition in the gym while we waited to perform. We were playing cards together. She was a few years older than me and seemed nice. I didn’t know she had decided that day to start praying for me. Later I would show up at her church, nervous but hopeful because I knew she attended there. Our friendship helped change the course of my life.
I think of my first College roommate, Hillary. She was petite, energetic, and smart. From the first moment, we met she liked me. I was inspired by her faith in people. I have taken that little bit of her with me wherever I go.
I think of my Brad. He was such a rebel in bible college, and yet he had a huge heart. No matter the adventure, somehow I find myself climbing on the back of his motorcycle and off we go. The road less traveled has not been easy for us, but he has never strayed from my side.
Then there is my mother-in-law Sandy. I will never forget the time the family was seated around my kitchen table. The kids were still small then. I had just pulled the sweet potatoes out of the oven and somehow managed to drop them on the floor. The family stopped talking to watch how I would respond with company over. Instantly she stood up and said, “I’ll take that one,” pointing to the scattered sweet potatoes on the linoleum. “They taste better when they have a little dirt on them,” she said with a wink.
Then she happily dug right in.
I think of my friend Nichole. She has a way with me. After many years of being a workaholic and not letting in friendships, she somehow made her way into my heart. She helped me to see life is much more beautiful when we allow others in.
I had been so afraid of letting people down if they knew the real me. With her soul-soothing words, she helped me come out of hiding.
Oh, but you got to have friends…
We have so many blind spots we cannot see. We need others to come along and show us in their unique way, through the language of friendship, how to get through. Maybe their words come in the form of a game of cards, or a hot cup of coffee. Maybe their love and support are found in the act of swallowing a less-than-perfect sweet potato.
I am grateful that through the many hardships in life, these people have made the road less lonely. In this season as I am in the process of writing my memoir, I am trying to reframe some of the saddest moments with the great people I have met along the way.
“Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.”
Who has been a special influence on your life? Take a moment today to think of them. If you can, drop them a line to just let them know how much they mean to you.
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